This morning dawned.
I suppose it had to. Nobody asks days if they want to dawn. Its all pressure and expectation.
Needless to say no miraculous cure overnight. Mrsinky off for visit with friends leaving me with foal today. Foal has taken up trumpet and is doing v well (cue Mandy Rice Davies but she really is) but I loathe and abominate all brass instruments so this is a new hell for me. The last trumpet player I liked was Satchmo.
This morning was the Suffolk Youthicised musicorama school thing meaning I had to sit for 90 mins waiting whilst juvenile brass players farted down drainpipes.
I woke with a sinhs headache so this was not good. I took work along but could not concentrate. Mass transfer dynamics must wait.
Concentration is something i cannot currently do.
Breathing is another. Lungs are very twitchy. If I dont keep an eye on it airways close and i start accessory breathing which is fine till i walk or talk. Ran out of breath halfway thru an order in Pizza Slut.
I didnt rant about foals Parent Consultation Day. Partly because I am worried about her. Having a sick Dad and a stressed Mum and being cared for by a Tattooine moneylender is affecting her school work.
But I am angry about the process. You are given 15 minute slots. Child present. The teacher reads out the scores from her laptop. The teacher then suggests actions. Then a buzzer sounds and you move on. Speed dating for edumaphiles.
Needless to say I booked a double slot. Foal absent. I spent 10 mins explaining in detail why this was such a bad idea and exactly where they could put the notion of the child to be present for all consultation frankly listen to the situation was completely ridiculous how on earth you're supposed to have an adult conversation and exchange meaningful ideas in the presence of a vulnerable audience is beyond me the whole thing was a massive pr exercise so they could say that they have consulted as that actually having let us say anything at all it was frankly disgusting. I don't know if this is due to the headmistress of the school or if it is a government initiative or if it is just for straight out of the ass of a pr person, however whatever it is it really really will not do. I think I have made this perfectly plane now I expect the teacher will be regretting for a long time the fact that I was off sick.
I suppose that I should not be mean to them they're trying to do a job badly. However i get very defensive I had an absolutely foul time in all of my schools i really don't want foal to have the same problem.
In other news when do you want to have the familiar in stable feeling that means i have to be very careful about moving around thats one reason why i am dictating this by voice i hope that i'm catching all of the errors .
Living with eds is complex i have little enough energy at the best of times. Having to spend an awful lot more energy simply watching where i put my feet, concentrating that i don't hyperextend my knees, being careful i don't pick something up too far, being careful i don't wave my hands and dislocate my wrist is something i just don't need.
Just imagine gentle reader that each time he went to the toilet you have to concentrate on how you held your c*** so that your hand did not hurt that is the position that i live in.
Good night and good luck.
