So another bad few days. After an argument with Mrsinky left me numb on Sunday I have relly struggled to go out. At the same time a post came up at a v good Uni I used to work at so I had to apply. The application ended up being 12 pages of close type. I have a cat in hells chance of getting it but had to try. Worst part was the equal opps form....they had a tick sheet for types of disability and i basically got bingo on it.
But the effort was exhausting. In the middle of it I had to stop and go to see the new psychiatrist, who gave me bupropion, which I am now on day 2 of. he was a gentle voiced beardy of the 'you believe it and thats what matters' school of cuntery. Still at least its a different thing to try.
All this has eft me exhausted and weepy. Ive had a lot of agoraphobic type incidents. Today am stuck in middle of the couch with the shakes.
my brain is not working well at all. every time i see mrsinky i just fall apart more.
nothing I do makes it better.
In other news I have a new cuddlepillow to support me during sleep and it is very good, but my neck hates it. not sure how to support that.
RantingScienceZebra The rantings of a bitter, twisted, sometimes crippled and rather mad scientist
Damn fine work with the application. Always remember that Yosser Hughes eventually got a job as King Theoden.
ReplyDeleteHello again. The 'House' bingo score may work in your favour if the uni has underscored on its self-imposed disability targets. Annoying isn't it? Like being a woman and rated only as part of someone else's ticky box win.
ReplyDeleteThe Bupropion story in this and your previous post is interesting. Why specifically for quitting smoking? One of its side effects can be anxiety (I just looked it up) which is baffling to me. Look forward to seeing how you get on with it.
Oh, and Mr Beardy Softspoken strikes me as nicer than Mrs Nasty, even though neither seem effective or intellectually bright. But niceness is a much under-rated quality IMO.
You take care now, y'hear? Lx
One day inky you must compile your ideal psychiatrist profile...I only really failed to get on with one psych - at the Maudsley. I think he got upset that I wrote my own notes during the consultations. Pah.
ReplyDeleteIn brighter news, a parcel of encouragement is on its way to your part of the world. It has lots of brown sticky tape on it, and can be opened without trepidation. The contents may not be 'evidence-based' but are guaranteed to be free of any trace of mindfulness woo.
Lots of love, Cathy.
Ideal psych evidence based...
ReplyDeleteBupropion was zyban, originally ddveloped as antinjcotine drug. They later found it was anti d.
Has tendency to slightly increase seizure risk. But much better profile than other anti d on side effects. However gp cannot go off label...
I suppose I meant in personal terms. The psych I did not get on with seemed to find me irritating. Which I was. A 28 year old trying to starve herself IS dashed annoying.
ReplyDeleteGood information here from Medline Plus btw: http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/druginfo/meds/a695033.html
Good wishes.
But I dont want a personal relationship with a psych. I want a ratiknal evjdence based discussion. Feelings shouldnt come into it...
ReplyDelete