A morning spent alternating between caring for mrsinky and crying.
She cant understand how abhorrent to me her image of our future life is. I hear eher talk about free access and lots of visits but that to me is...Well I know it is the norm for many many peoplle. but to me it is a failure and a reproach. It is not a family life it is a vile mockery of one. Better nothing.
In other news I am due out tonight to have coffee with a human. I am being a bit coy because I havent told them I blog yet.
This is SPock arranging things.
Emo spent the morning on the floor in the kitchen rocking in foetal curl.
I am thinking of indulging in mindless sexathon with any and all. just something to numb the pain. Its destrcutive behaviour. But hell what is left to destroy?
RantingScienceZebra The rantings of a bitter, twisted, sometimes crippled and rather mad scientist
Thinking of you inky. I know you like to keep your internet friends as virtual strangers, but {{{hugs}}} anyway. xxx
ReplyDeleteBut hell what is left to destroy?- Your frenulum?
ReplyDeleteYou're the one best placed to know where the line between 'Right, here I am, get on/in' and 'hurt me when you fuck me, 'cos I'm a worthless shit' is. Even if you misjudge it a bit and go overboard, I wouldn't worry too much.
I sincerely hope that next time you are rocking on the kitchen floor it is in happier circumstances.
frenulum went years ago during maritals with Mrsinky. An audible twang, roughly a c below the stave.
DeleteCarrying on with a snapped banjo string? Truly you are the Seasick Steve of cock.
DeleteHope the coffee went well.
'Seasick Steve of Cock'. Should you decide to go on a sextravanganza get this printed on your T-shirt. Or get it tattooed as the name of the dragon.
Deletemaybe on printed pants? or on a business card as an endorsement?
DeleteMorning all.
ReplyDeleteHow are you today, Inky? I imagine still feeling like absolute shit.
All I can offer is that after going through the break up of my first marriage (daughter was 9 at the time, yes, I know...) which I didn't initiate and didn't want and didn't cope with at all well, I ended up with a wonderful second husband and a son who is a constant delight to me. We celebrated our 30th anniversary last year. There are many people with similar stories.
Not that it will help you much at the moment, but just saying that nice things can happen as well, and surprisingly more often than you might think. Also you are a good and interesting person and there are lots of potential partners out there who would count themselves blessed to find someone who actually wants to have a partner and family.
No morphine today either, because today I don't need it, which is good. Now the Tanqueray, on the other hand...
Take care. Lx
so glad you are able to be morphine free today. I am busy enough not to think . I suspect that s the best I can hope for at the moment
Delete